Wednesday, January 31, 2007

My Good News...

Here is the the little secret I've been keeping from my blog. Since miscarrying last summer I was a hesitant to get the word out right away. Honestly, I still feel wary of publicizing my pregnancy, but I won't let the past rob my joy over this child. SO, here's why I've been sick, tired, moody and utterly happy the last few months. Emphasis on tired, though. Thankfully, everything is going well and come August there will be a new little face in our family. We can't wait!

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Baby Talk

Here is a conversation Johnny and I have a few times a day..
Mama: "Are you my baby?"
Johnny: " Aye a maan!
Mama: Are you my boy?
Johnny: "Aye a maaaaan!!!
Mama: "Oh! You're my little man!"
Johnny: "Uh-huh."

Here's my little man in his bubble bath. He likes having a beard like his Papa.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007


The title of this post refers to what Johnny says when he wants to nurse. As crass as it may be, we have come to think it's quite funny and cute. Believe me, I have tried to get him to say nurse or nursey, anything else really. But, no. It's boob. Anyways, in the recent edition of Mothering magazine they chose a universal symbol for breastfeeding in hopes that it will appear in public places, on the door of a mother's lounge for example. The point is to create a more breastfeeding-friendly society. I love the image they chose and hope to see it in public. I, personally, have never had a bad experience breastfeeding in public. We aren't nursing a whole lot anymore but when I did I was always comfortable nursing wherever I happened to be. I've been invited to some nurse-ins by La Leche League but have never gone. Maybe if I'd had a bad experience where I was told to leave or something I would feel like more of an activist about it. But also, I've avoided them (nurse ins, not LLL) because I just don't view nursing my son as a statement. I think that why I know a lot of women are turned off to LLL, because they seem to come on too strong and want everyone to be activists. Don't get me wrong, they are a wonderful organization and can provide much needed support, especially in the first weeks when nursing can be stressful and painful, and I love the books they have published. Come to think of it, I must have tiny bit of activist in me considering how much I love the breastfeeding symbol and think it would look great on a t-shirt or baby onesie, etc.. I guess it's just sad how it seems like we have to choose sides in terms of how we mother. We put eachother into categories. This is especially evident to me when I attend a baby shower. As I talk with women about my birth or children and they hear I am still nursing my son, or that I had a drug free birth, they act like or sometimes come right out and say, "oh you are one of those." It bothers me. Some of you have been blogging a little about this and I guess it got me thinking. I know I personally am really trying not to put other women into a box or assume too much about how they mother by something like whether they nurse or not. I suppose that is another reason I have not gotten too heavily involved in LLL or AP play groups. I just don't want everyone I hang out with to have the exact same philosophy on mothering that I do.( not that I even follow AP by the book, anyhow) One of my best friends has raised her babies very differently than I have raised Johnny, yet I think we share the a very similar heart and passion for being moms. However, my carefulness in not judging others' methods of mothering has also encouraged me to be more open about my own. I used to feel embarrassed about telling people that Johnny sleeps with us, especially if I had already heard them go on and on about their baby sleeping through the night is his own room. I figured they would think I was a real push over. Our decision to co-sleep wasn't made by default; we gave it a lot of time, entered into it with a let's-see-if-this-works attitude, and felt at peace with our decision. We followed our hearts and I think that is the best we can do when it comes to those issues of parenting. I just hate to see women feeling like they have to decide how they are going to mother their baby when they are six months pregnant. Let them enter the world, stare at their little faces, get to know them a little bit and follow what your heart (not your crazy post-pardum emotions) is telling you. I know I didn't settle into my role as mama until Johnny was at least a few months old, but I would've been even more of wreck if I were trying to follow one strict philosophy that didn't allow a whole lot of flexibility.
Man, I think I've said enough. So, I hope this doesn't leave any of you with an "oh, she's one of those" feeling, I would hate to alienate anyone who has until now enjoyed visiting my blog. If you love your babies and are doing what you know is best and works for you and them, then we've got a whole lot in common!

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Evan Jr.

Once I was out alone with Johnny and I actually had this lady say to me, " Oh, he must look like his daddy." She has no idea how right she was.

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

New Year, New Post, Same Old Me..

Again, not feeling much like blogging these days. But I am disappointed with myself for not busting out a nice Christmas blog with news of our festivities and pictures from all the nice family get togethers. It was all very warm and every year reminds me how grateful I should be for family and the generations my son is getting to grow up amidst. And the important thing is, CHRIST IS BORN! The services were beautiful and plentiful. We haven't been to church since Christmas due to a nasty cold and I can tell Johnny misses it. He keeps saying, "I won Awl" which means he wants Father Al, our priest. Hopefully, we will all be recovered and make it to vespers this Saturday.
New Years haven't been a big thing for me since becoming a Mama. Although, I was never much of a partier before that, either. I didn't anticipate even staying up past 10 o'clock, but we actually had a very fun night. Johnny had a bad cough which kept waking him, so I finally brought the poor kid downstairs where we all watched the Garrison Keeler New Years Special on KPBS. It was done very much like the Prairie Home Companion Shows and had some beautiful music. Johnny cracked us up as he danced and strummed on his tummy like he was playing guitar at 11 o'clock at night. At midnight, we gave each other new year/good night kisses and fell asleep to the sound of illegal fireworks. The best part was sleeping in the next morning!
2007 will mark ten years since I graduated high school. Ten years since I moved on my own to California from the Philippines, where I had lived for ten years as the daughter of missionaries.Ten years since I first shook hands and was introduced to my husband. Although, it wasn't until January of the following year that we spoke again. These are the sort of things a fresh year make me think about.
And of course, I am one of those suckers who makes some resolutions. Some are stupid, others more serious.
Here are a few.. Maybe publicizing them will help me keep them.
1. Write a letter to our Grandparents at least twice a month. I am shooting for once a week. Part of why I started this blog was because I am terrible about sending letters and e-mails, so I thought I could post my news and pictures here. Unfortunately, our Grandparents don't have access to the internet all the time and I need let them know I think about them and keep them informed on our lives.
2. Cook and bake more. I want to really dive into new recipes and bake and cook food that intimidates me. My goal is to only bake my bread instead of buy it. I've been baking bread for some time and actually worked in a bakery, so that doesn't intimidate me, it just requires more out of me.
3. Sew something, anything. I have a machine on loan for a few months and I need to put that baby to work.
4. Pray more. Memorize prayers.
5. Read more.
What are yours?
Well, I am enjoying getting caught on all my blogging friends holidays and celebrations. May this be a blessed new year for all!

And now for something completely different...Who knew a one year old could look THIS bad?!